Swindler being Swindled

HATI-HATI KEPADA WARGA IIUM:

Tadi after kelas and after habis past2 kertas past yr midterm computer security aku plan nk balik bilik.. Nk rehat.. Tp time kt area antara E0 engineering and Cafe Edu ada sorang mamat NEGRO tahan aku.. Dia tanya mna KICT.. Tp yg x boleh blaaa apa yg dia ckp b4 tu..

Swindler: Salam brother

Me: Waalaikumsalam

Swindler: Oh! You r Muslim?? I thought you were Indian

Me: (^_^) yes i'm a Muslim.. *dalam hati, org india pun ada jg yg Muslim okay, for example my GRANDPA*

Swindler: Can you show me where is KICT?

Me: *pointing to KICT's direction* Over there..

Swindler: Can you come with me and show it to me please..

Me: errmmm... *then dia terus tarik tangan ku, mmg dh x boleh nk ckp apa la*

So the story continue..

Time jalan dalam area Engineering tu sempat la juga b'bual2.. But time ni naluri menyatakan mamat ni nk TIPU DUIT ku a.k.a nk pinjam then terus menghilangkan diri.. Tp aku play along je la since i was bored and i want to see what kind of technique he want to use to swindle my money.. So perbualan dlm perjalanan tu dia ckp dia PUASA.. Dia PUASA sbb mama dia SAKIT.. Which is the 1st step in swindling.. MAKE PEOPLE PITY YOU.. Ok, aku dngr jak la.. Dia cakap mama dia kerja as a lecturer dekat one of the university d Singapore.. Bapa dia Black Canadian.. Mama dia Singaporean.. And dia only child dlm family dia.. Plus, he said dia student Kulliyyah of ECONOMICS AND MANAGEMENTS, stay kt Mahallah ALI.. Dia minta aku tolong teman p KICT sbb dia ckp org x faham slang English dia.. Dia ckp “people said my English are britian English, not many people can understand it”.. Tp from what I can hear, he was using common African English slang.. Well budak2 UIAM mesti dh lali kn dgn slang English Africa..Dia just guna slang British English time dia ckp org ckp dia gn slang British… Hahaha.. Which I found to be VERY FUNNY.. Nmpk sgt slang “paksa”.. Mcm org yg not very familiar dgn slang british but trying to use it.. Which is out of place here and there.. Tp aku layan je la sbb aku tgh bosan.. Try to fool me, so I fool him back.. By logic klu nk p KICT via Engineering Department dr E0 tu kena la go through E0 à E1 à E2 then dr sebelah lif E2 tu pergi ke KICT.. Tp kt E0 tu dia nk pergi keselekoh tmpt area mahallah perempuan tu.. So aku betul kn la jalan.. Then dia cakap “Sorry I forgot the way”.. NOTE: take note dgn ayat dia ni..

And the time kt depan simpang tu aku tunjuk la kt dia KICT tu.. Nk suruh dia p sendiri.. Tp dia paksa juga aku ikut.. Dia ckp “This is my first time here”.. (Remember apa yg aku suruh TAKE NOTE kt atas, sila bandingkan dengan apa yg dia cakap sekarang).. Tadi cakap “lupa jalan”, skg ckp “1^st time here”.. How could you “lupa jalan” is this is ur 1^st time here.. Tp aku ikut je la, play along.. Time ni la baru dia tunjuk MOTIF UTAMA DIA.. hahaha.. Dia ckp dia mahu jumpa kawan dia which is a lecturer.. Orang Somalia.. Nama kawan dia USMAN/OTHMAN (bunyi either these two la).. Dia mahu jumpa kawan dia sbb mahu PINJAM DUIT KT KAWAN DIA.. Then dia cakap “If I couldn’t found my friend, can I borrow your money? I need to go to Singapore to meet my sick mother”.. Well, aku just angguk kepala jak la sbb it’s getting more and more exciting.. Hahaha.. Dia dh mula kn second stage swindling dia.. By this time aku dh bt calculation on what he will do next.. My calculation were:

1        1)      Dia ada try cari kawan dia

2        2)      Tapi kawan dia xde kt KICT

3        3)      So dia pinjam duit dr aku sbb x jumpa kawan dia

These were what I expected.. Hahaha.. Time sampai KICT tu dia terus masuk dalam RESEARCH CENTER.. Dia tanya org dlm tu klu USMAN/OTHMAN ada.. Org dalam tu blurrr2 jak.. Dia cakap xde lecturer nama Usman.. Mamat negro tu terus cakap “oh that’s okay” then dia terus tgk aku.. Tp belum sempat dia mahu cakap, brother dlm research center tu ckp “let me take a look 1^st”.. And in the end ada sorg Prof nama Usman.. Office dia kt Level4 IS department.. Time tu muka dia mmg PRICELESS.. Hahaha.. It was like *HUH THERE IS SOMEONE NAMED USMAN HERE???*.. Time ni aku mmg dh excited gila sbb plan dia doesn’t goes as what he planned.. Aku p la tarik dia p level4 IS department tu.. Hahaha.. Ada je lift kt tepi tangga tu tp aku p naik TANGGA.. That way we could have A LONG TALK.. Dr level1 ke level4 naik tangga.. Throughout naik tangga tu he kept on stressing that IF WE COULD NOT FIND HIS FRIEND, I SHOULD LEND HIM MONEY… Hahaha.. Aku angguk kepala jak la then ckp “But I only have RM3 in my pocket right now”.. Then he said “SHIITTT!!”.. Hahaha.. Aku rasa over excited pula, mcm aku pula yg jahat ni.. Hahaha.. Well he tried to fool me, so he deserve that.. Lepas tu dia cakap “You could cash out money from the bank can you?”.. So aku jawab “errmmm yes I could cash out money”.. Aku x tipu pun ya, mmg aku boleh cash out money, but I didn’t say I will cash it out and give it to him.. Hohoho..

So sampai je kt Level4 IS Department mmg muka dia cuak dia.. Well of course la dia cuak kn, ada org nama USMAN kt KICT..  Then kami tanya sister kt depan kaunter tu.. Then dia ckp errmmm I don’t know anyone with the name USMAN.. Terus cerita muka mamat negro tu.. Aku ckp la “aren’t there anyone with the name USMAN or something similar to that”.. So sister tu ckp “wait here, I’ll ask the other staff”.. So kakak tu p la cari  sister lain, then sister tu ckp “are you looking for Prof xxxx Usman?” Then mamat negro tu ckp “No I’m looking for a lecturer not professor”.. Kakak tu dh blurrr dh.. Then mamat negro tu senyum and cakap “That’s okay, let’s go”.. So kami keluar la and dia pun start la cakap whether it is okay if I could lend him money.. MEMANDANGKAN SESI SWINDLER DIA DH KT FINAL STAGE, aku pun memulakan la sesi KASI CUAK DIA.. hahaha..

Time kt dalam lif tu I lure him to let his guard down.. And start to say that I don’t have much money in my bank account.. Saja cakap mcm tu sbb mahu tgk reaksi dia.. Dia ckp dia nk pinjam duit utk tambang teksi dr UIAM ke Johor… Bila aku cakap aku xda byk duit kt bank, dia ckp la “errmmm, then could you lend me money to go to KLIA, I will pay it back to you on Monday”.. Dalam hatiku *you think that I’m a fool or something*.. Td cakap nk minta bayar kn teksi ke Johor, tp bila aku ckp kurg duit, dia minta bayar ke KLIA pula.. Can you see the connection here?? Can you see what wrongs with his statement?? Well, dia cakap dia xda duit and mahu pinjam duit ku utk p Johor, but then tukar pula ke KLIA sbb aku ckp aku “kurg” duit nk bg pinjam dia.. CAN YOU SEE IT NOW?? Hahaha.. Klu dia dh xde duit nk p Johor sampai ke tahap nk pinjam duit org, then WHY ON EARTH HE WANT TO GO TO KLIA?? Nk beli tiket mmg dh xde duit la kn.. Ke dia nk p tipu org kt sana pula..

Lepas tu aku ckp la kt dia, “Maybe we should go to the Finance Division, They might be able to lend you some money.. I know some of the staff there.. Do you want to go?? Well, they should be able to help  IIUM student regarding money-related problem, and this is an emergency”.. (sebenarnya aku x kenal sapa2 pun and I don’t think Finance boleh bg duit mcm tu je kt student~~that is if he really is an IIUM Student).. Terus muka mamat tu panik gila, then dia cakap “That is okay brother, I’ll try to ask from someone else”.. Dia dh nk lari dh.. But time ni aku dh excited sgt and I don’t want him to go just yet.. I’m having so much fun at that time.. So aku ckp la “errmmm I think there is an ATM machine here somewhere”.. Then dia ckp “yes there is, it’s over there, could you cash out money and lend it to me”.. Then dia start tunjuk jalan p ATM machine tu.. Hahaha.. Tadi dia cakap “This is my FIRST TIME HERE”.. Tp tau pula dia kn mana ATM Machine.. Aku yg dh byk kali p KICT pun xtau mna ATM Machine tu.. Nmpk sgt penipu mamat ni..

Time kt KICT tu aku ada nmpk two familiar faces… One of them bdk Sarawak… Dia tgh kt dalam tmpt ATM tu.. So time baris kt luar tu aku p la buat FINALE ACT.. Aku ckp la kt dia fasal Finance Division lagi.. Aku cakap “Are you sure you don’t want to go to Finance Division?? I could ask them you know, I know some of the staff there.. I could ask for their help.. Let’s go there”.. Then dia ckp dgn muka panik “that’s okay brother, if you don’t want to help me it is okay”.. So aku ckp la “I am helping you, I’m helping you by showing you the way to Finance Division”.. Then dia ckp “That’s okay, I’ll try to ask someone else”.. Then dia blaaaa… So aku tunggu member Sarawak tu keluar dr “kotak kaca ATM” tu and sapa dia… hahaha.. Lepas tu aku balik bilik… Hahaha..

MORALE OF THE STORY, I might look like someone who is easily fooled by other, but you are a fool if you think that way.. Hahaha.. I’m not easily fooled.. Try to fool me, bare the consequences.. Hahaha.. I’m someone who could make Shin'ichi Akiyama (Liar Game) cry…  

ANOTHER MORALE OF THE STORY, Don’t believe people blindly especially strangers.. Although “bersangka baik” tu amalan yg baik, tp sometime you have to have doubt..

~THE END~